Have you established a hobby out of your drinking habits? Do you treat drinking alcohol like you going to the gym or playing tennis? Do you deliberately not do things regularly because it requires you to drive and you can't drink then. This doesn't apply to you who live in countries where you can have 2-3 drinks and still be below the legal limit. In countries like Sweden and Israel, you can't even drink a bottle of beer and drive legally.
If you drink more than three times a week, I would say you have established a habit I would call a "bad hobby." I am not talking about having a glass of wine for dinner or a beer. What you need to pay attention to is if you like to drink two glasses or more of wine every evening, if yes, you established a bad habit. Ask yourself, why do I want to drink alcohol? It's tasty, it makes you relaxed, or do you want to feel the buzz? A study in the reputable medical journal The Lancet last year looked at alcohol, and the effect is having on humans. They concluded that there is no safe level of drinking because we are all different, and there are many variables that interact if alcohol is damaging to your body or not. Furthermore, the study showed that alcohol has no positive effects on the body, quite the opposite.
From personal experiences, I know how easy it is to establish this new hobby I call drinking. I like the buzz and alcohol makes me cheerful so for a period I had a couple of drinks 4-5 times/ week, and until I realize how it affected my life, I was looking forward to those drinks before supper and apart of me wanted 1-2 more. I was on my way to establish a hobby that wasn't good for me. Nowadays I drink maybe 4-5 times each month and pay attention to the frequency and amount. The drinking hobby doesn't happen overnight. It takes time to develop. If you take a hard look at your drinking life, you know if you drink a little bit too much, way too much or not too much. It will be much harder to cut back if you have a drinking buddy, for many, that's a spouse. This takes everything to a different level and makes it much harder to cut back or stop drinking altogether because you do share the hobby. You have something in common. And as the saying goes: Misery likes company.
How to change, cut back on your drinking. It's hard to tell if you have become an alcoholic or not. If you are aware of that you drink way too much I suggest that you get professional help. For some it's not be easy to know if one drink too much or not. You might live in denial and do not think you drink too much. Please, ask someone close to you who knows how much you drink. Be brutally honest towards yourself. You might have to stop drinking altogether, or you be able to cut back considerably. If you can lower consumption yourself, I suggest you get busy with something that makes drinking impossible. It could be going somewhere that requires driving 2-3 evenings a week, and activity that would suffer if you drank. Replace the drinking hobby with another hobby. Again, any doubts, please consider professional help. Drinking alcohol is complex issue, and for many it causes misery. This post is very generalized and only cover the topic briefly. Good Luck!
Please, scroll down and read the two previous posts first. I have discussed Dr. Jordan Peterson in the two previous posts. Why he is hated by so many, I will know talk about why he is liked by so many.
One explanation is that he is filling a gap for many, not only for young men but also for older men and women. He is somehow putting things back to order in the minds of people. The society in countries like Sweden has lowered their ceiling what is politically correct to express. If you have listened to Dr. Peterson, you have heard him talk about the atrocities down by the communist regimes in Mao's China and Stalin's Russia. An estimation is that they killed more than 80,000 000 of their people. When I went to school in the seventies, we did not learn much about these genocides. The main reason was probably Sweden's socialistic government (which had been reelected for 40 years) which claimed to be neutral but leaned to the left. We had Swedish political leaders who were good friends with people like Fidel Castro and Yasser Arafat. Therefore the educational material like books did not bring up the slaughter by the communistic regimes. Today, 2019, the Swedish mentality is still tainted by this. One example, it is unacceptable for a person to get away with openly support the national socialistic ideology, basically being a nazi. In Sweden, we have one of the best-known actors and one of the most recognized athletic team coaches belonging to one of the more extreme Swedish communistic parties. No one publicly questions their philosophy, believes, and affiliation. Even though any grown-up who finish high school understands that the communistic society has failed and failed again and taken millions of lives. This behavior we call (as you know) double standard. It seems to become more and more common. What can you do, and what can I do is to speak up against injustice and censorship. And, what I am telling my kids, treat others the way you want to be treated!. Have a Great Day!
Please, read the previous post first. Yes, I talked about that Dr. Jordan Peterson is controversial among many and loved among many. Why is he controversial? Is it because he is saying the obvious that people who want to have the cake and eat it at the same time don't want to hear? It rocks their boat and makes them uncomfortable. Or is it growing jealousy and envy that he is making big money and is a good business person? Even if you don' t like Peterson, you can't take away his honesty. You get what you see. You probably have listened to hundreds of coaches, "authorities" in their field telling you things, what you should do and not do. Your gut tells you this is just business talk about getting you to do what the person wants you to do. If you listen to Peterson, you can tell he 100% believes what he is saying. No B.S. because he gets emotional, sometimes even cries. No one can fake that without being an award-winning actor. You don't need to agree with everything that he is saying. I don't. The problem is if you disagree with everything he is saying, it says more about you than about Peterson. Like the Swedish minister of foreign affairs, I think it is fair to say she's a radical feminist. When Peterson was in Sweden last year, she said something like he should crawl back to the rock he came from. Again, this statement says more about Margot Wallström than about Peterson.
I can understand that Peterson rubs people the wrong way; he is very articulate, intelligent, and does his homework before talking. He looks deeper into things than most people. We have a trend in western countries like Sweden with growing radical feminism that not is disputed. It does not lead to any good neither for men, nor women. Gillette, the shaving company, recently had to pull and ad with a Metoo theme after massive protests.
What is needed is a grown-up discussion between people who are willing to discuss. These debaters have to know the subject they want to discuss, do their homework. NOT, only try to shut the other person down because they don't like what he or she is saying. Because this is The universities here need to act assertively and don't give in to a mob mentality. Because if they don't begin to show some backbone, we are heading for a tribal society, even more than we have today and this does not lead to any good, not for anyone.
In what direction are we going? There seems to be a shrinking willingness to debate and exchange information. If we look at university campuses in the US, UK, and many other places, it's quite shocking. If someone has an opinion that in any way question perks of a minority or being treated differently, he or she get shouted at, bullied, and called all kind of racist names. Respect is out the window. The misinformed and rude students do not want to debate, make the person quit because he or she doesn't share their opinion. Why? Isn't that the way it works in a dictatorship? Why can't we discuss and share different opinions and ideas? One of the worst examples of this is how Cambridge university in England treated Dr. Jordan Peterson. He was invited to visit on a fellowship for a couple of months. During his lecture tour earlier this year the audience was able to buy a VIP ticket included was having a photo taken with Peterson. It was discovered that one man had worn a t-shirt that said I'm an Islamophobic in larger print. The smaller print stated that he didn't dislike Muslims or Islam etc. Cambridge University found out about this photo and canceled Peterson's fellowship, not by contacting him personally, no via a Tweet. The explanation was; " ...endorsement by affiliation..." it looks like, some influential people at the university didn't want to have Peterson there in the first place. They were just looking for an excuse to pull the plug on his visit. Yes, for some reason Peterson is controversial among many people; why, because he dares to speaks up? More about him at the next blog post.
Is this the new future? Yes, we are there, everything has to be politically correct, and people get offended from a minor thing and make a big deal out of it. The media is also to blame for this.
The text of this post orginates from my Final Paper in the Advanced Human Sexuality course. It takes about the new laws in Sweden and New Zealand regarding prostitution and the results of these. The word prostitute originates from Latin and means “to be exposed for sale.". Prostitution is called the world’s oldest profession. It may precede humanity. Animal behaviorists have observed primates in prostitution like behavior, offering sex for food, or avoiding an attack. Penguins have been studied exchanging sex for stones, including females with a partner. The first indications of human prostitution are from Mesopotamia 2400 BCE. Prostitution is a subject of controversy. Attitudes on prostitution are likely to take one of two approaches. First, respect a woman’s right to sell sex as an aspect of her right to choose what she will do with her body. Second, prostitution is a humiliation, and indignity, it is a way of male control over women’s bodies.
Sweden prohibited the purchase of sex 1999. New Zealand legalized prostitution in 2003. Two different approaches. Around the globe, countries have adapted different laws; from making prostitution illegal, restrict it, legalize it, to not to regulate it at all. Sweden has taken a unique approach, and countries like Norway and Iceland have followed.
The words on the streets of Stockholm do not support this official theory. In the capital, there is a place called Prostitution Center. It has a questionable reputation among the women on the street, referred to as having unfriendly and condescending social workers. The center assists prostitutes with filling out forms to different government agencies, refer to counseling, and schedule medical check-ups. Also, service the prostitutes' rate as unfriendly with an authoritarian approach. A prostitute who went to the healthcare clinic claims she received slow-release hormonal contraceptives without considering her doubts and objections.
Furthermore, social workers in Sweden oppose condom distribution to sex workers because it would make them accomplices in prostitution. No official data are available regarding whether or not violence against street prostitutes increased since the new law from 1999 that criminalizes the purchase of sex. The Swedish sex workers’ association, Rosea, stated that there had been an escalation in violence, both on the streets and elsewhere: The law scares away "normal" clients but not violent ones, pressure prostitutes to accept the latter. An obstetrician who works with abused women confirms an increase in sexual violence on the streets. It looks like the no-violent clients seek sex on the internet. The general secretary of the RFSU, the national association for sexual education, believes that the new law increased women’s vulnerability and as they have become less visible, more controlled by pimps. She claims prostitution is a social problem and can only be reduced by social actions and the change of attitudes- not by legislations. Prostitutes in Europe are critical and disapprove of the Swedish feminists who claim to be spokespersons for the prostitutes. They go so far and accuse that the law against buying sex was a way of non-prostitute women to dominate prostitutes. A prostitute who has been politically active for twenty years continues by stating that it’s like they (Swedish feminists) using the old patriarchal system to separate between descent and fallen women. This law was in many ways pushed by radical feminists who think that unthinkable a woman would voluntarily do sex work. Instead, the official Swedish stand is that women in prostitution are forced and oppressed by men. The new Swedish law doesn't distinct between trafficking and prostitution.
What is the result of the Swedish law?
A reduction in prostitution cannot be proven. It is impossible to establish a cause-effect link due to the expanding adverting on the internet. Five years after the implementation of the law, it was a 40% reduction of visible prostitutes on the street (in the center of Stockholm, there is only one street used by prostitutes). The Prostitution Center has contact with about 500 women annually. During the first four years of the new millennium (2000-2003) the center had 130 sex workers in their treatment program. About 60% stopped selling sex, and many claimed the new law was a significant incentive for them seeking help ). Because of the rise in the internet market, it does not point in the direction of the law’s aim. Furthermore, an official Swedish report states that the extent of prostitution and trafficking in Sweden is unknown.
What do prostitutes think about the new legislation in New Zealand
Since the Prostitution Reformed Act (PRA) that made buying and selling sex legal, it seems to have improved the situation for the prostitutes: (a) decrease in violence, more than before able to reject clients; (b) better relationship between sex workers and the police. Prostitutes can or at least threaten to report problematic clients to the police; (c) safer for streetwalkers, now they can work in more open locations; (d) because it is legal less stress to negotiate the prices; (e) the health of prostitutes has improved; (f) report increased level of wellbeing and validation as a result of that their work has become legal although sex work is still stigmatized; (g) flexibility where to work and under which conditions; (h) sex workers can manage their work reduces opportunities for exploitation by third parties like pimps, brothel, and massage parlor managers/owners. Like any other employer, they need to create an appealing work environment, or the sex worker will go somewhere else or work for themselves.
This paper explored prostitution. It focused mainly on the different situations in Sweden and New Zealand regarding the legislation of sex work. The former made purchasing sex illegal in 1999 and the latter legalized prostitution in 2003. The focus was on the situation of the prostitutes. There seems to be a “big brother” mentality in countries like Sweden, where the government and other vocal groups, and individuals act like spoke persons for all the sex workers. Laws are legislated and implemented without asking them how their situation could be improved. Is it naïve and absurd to think prostitution could become eradicated? Considering 400,000 prostitutes are working in Germany. In Zurich, there are over 2,5 million purchases of sex annually. I would say yes. As the secretary of the Swedish national unit for sexual education stated; prostitution is, to a large extent, a social problem and should be dealt with accordingly, not by illegalization. What can we do to make it as safe and healthy as possible for the prostitutes and their clients? The author of this paper thinks New Zealand has chosen a path that is necessary but not optimal. It needs some modifications. Prostitution, will continue to exist, like it or not, we all have to accept it.
Have s Great Day!
I read an article in the major Swedish newspaper, Dagens Nyheter. It was an interview with American psychology professor Steven Pinker who works at Harvard.
In this interview, Dr. Pinker pointed out what we know that media often exaggerate bad news and play down the good news. This forward a doomsday mentality. Things have become much better, and conflicts are solvable without violence and war. Pinker brought up an issue I think interesting. He believes we humans need different kinds of control systems, so we don't get tempted to abuse each other and the system. This content should be for everyone without exemption. Unfortunately, the Swedish government doesn't understand this. Therefore if it easy to cheat the system and the risk of getting caught is slim, it invites you to abuse the system. Here are three examples from the Swedish society 2019. First, the assistance at home elderly and disabled individuals have the right to get help. The government subsidizes it. Private companies have cheated on how many visits they have made and overbilled.
Second, In Sweden you also get subsidized taxi rides if you are disabled, you never pay more than about U.S.$7 for a trip even if the meter stops at $122. The government reimburses the taxi company. When they were audited, it was discovered many people had made ten taxi rides/day for a year, according to the company. This is, of course, was impossible but the company got tempted to abuse the liberal system and billed the government for an outrageous amount of rides.
Three, overcharging and cheat the system when it comes to bill the government for physio treatment. This is one of the reasons I don't live in Sweden anymore. I worked as a physio in the public health care system. In Sweden, you can get a private agreement with the government, not easy get and sometimes you can buy an existing one. Then the patient pays as the above taxi rides, only a part of the cost. In the Swedish system, you as a physio get paid differently depending on your post-education and how much time you spend with a specific patient. If a patient train in your gym and you get the lowest pay. If you are highly qualified and work on the patient on the treatment table for a minimum of 40 minutes, you receive the highest payment, about four times as much as the gym patient. You see where I'm going with this....What many physios have done for decades is to cheat the system. They go into the gym and say hi to two patients who are working out and bill the government for 2x40 minutes on the treatment table. The bottom line is that these individuals earn a monthly salary that is 4-5 times higher than a physio who works double the time in the public health care system.
These examples show that even a free democratic society needs some form of control. If it is easy to cheat the system, many get tempted. As in it the case of Sweden, the government has to pay billions for being gullible and not having a control system in place. Have a great day!
I hope you got a good start this year. If you already falling behind on your new years resolutions it's not a big deal. so long as you feel you are beginning to change even if it's barely measurable. One little thing every day adds up during a year. This isn't as easy as it might sound. Where does one begin?
If you aren't happy at work look in to what you can do to change. It could minor things like talk to your boss about the things you are dissatisfied with, remember don't complain. Present a problem with a solution. People love to hear how to fix things instead of having to listen to complains. If this isn't an option, begin to plan how to change things yourself. You might have to quit and look for another job, these things require planning, It's seldom good to quit cold turkey. It might take a while to find something else so be patient! May be you could consider to go back to school part time and improve your skills or change profession all together. Again, plan it and discuss it with your spouse. It might take a year or three before the change is complete so do not be discourage. Really think it through how you will make the work part of your life better.
Exercise and weight loss, it's all about habits. If you, let say have 100 lbs (45kg) over weight or more you first need look over you eating habits, please read my suggestions couple of posts ago. Get a physical check up if you are 40 or older! Begin to walk 30 minutes each day, Eat yout last meal at 18:00 five days/week and it will make a big diffeent in the long run. The key here is NOT to change maany things at once, you hear me, only couple of things each months. Remember, it took time to put on those extra pounds/kilograms and it will take time to loose them, period!
-Chris (IronCouch. com)
I wish everyone a Merry Christmas & Happy New Year! I hope 2019 will be a healthy and good one for you. When you look back at you will be proud of the accomplishments. It doesn't matter where you are in life you are always a work in progress, do you feel it hasn't been much progress in 2018 it is time to change that. Start small, change, add, or eliminate things in you life to become a healthier person both physically and mentally. It could be cutting back on drinking or / and junk food, become more active. Maybe not letting your emotions run your life. Become clear what you expect from people. And remember almost everything worth while in life doesn't come fast and easy. Many times we need to sacrifice something short time for the benefit of a better life later, be able to do the things needed for the better future. This isn't easy at all. Most of us like to have the cake and eat it at the same time. BUT it is necessarily. Let me give you a personal example what I myself have to do. I like to carve wood and play the djembe drum. I haven't had much time for this the last year. I would like to prioritize those two things. It means I have to let something else go, temporarily or permanently. My priorities have to change. I might have to sacrifice and sell my motorcycle and become more effective about what I do with my time. .
I suggest that you sit down and write down (pen and paper) what you like to do in the next year: professionally, personally: relationships, hobbies,, health-wise: food and exercise. Then add one thing on each subject, an action how it will take you closer to what you want to accomplish, start small, or you will crash and burn before January 15.. If you do not succeed the first time, it doesn't mean you failed, no, pick your self up and keep doing it. Do NOT give up that is the key. Even if you feel you are doing microscopical progress it's progress and during a year it adds up. Good Luck and keep your spirit up!
We are in the middle of Hanukah celebration which is quite early this year. For our family it is the first of two holidays this month. We are a multicultural family; my wife being Jewish and myself born Christian (Lutheran). This works well in many aspect because we both are secular and embrace each others cultures. What I like the best about Hanukah is you get together as a family and light the candles in the menorah, which is a nine branched candelabrum. You lit a new candles each night for eight consecutive nights, I also like the latkes, fried potato pancakes which you eat during Hanukah, Latkes is a typical staple food in the Swedish kitchen, it brings back memories from my childhood. Another delicious fried food consumed during Hanukah are doughnuts. Usually they a filled with jam. I personally prefer the plain ones my wife makes.
The eight days celebration of Hanukah commemorates the re-dedication during the second century B.C. of the Second Temple in Jerusalem, where according to legend Jews had risen up against their Greek-Syrian oppressors. The wicks of the menorah miraculously burned for eight days, even though there was only enough sacred oil for one day's lighting. That is what the legend tells us
I wish everyone Happy Hanukah!
This is a multi-billion dollar question. BUT, it isn't as complicated as many want you to think, period! You need to eat three meals a day, breakfast, lunch and supper. Additionally you eat 1-3 snacks. You might say, I can't eat anything in the morning, then I suggest start small with maybe two spoons of yogurt for a week and then you add a spoon each week until you eat a full breakfast.
Breakfast, I have eaten oat porridge for the last 40 years with a handful annual exemptions when I eat pancakes. A bowl of porridge and I wrap it up with a piece of bread and a cup of coffee. If I would eat based on what I think is tasty it would be close to a dozen pancakes with maple sirup, or bacon and eggs, or giant bowl of corm flakes with sugar. Those alternatives aren't healthy to eat on a daily basis. to get you something to look forward to you could it a less healthy breakfast during the weekend. I tell my clients to keep a 80% good diets, that's good enough for most people.
Oat porridge with raisins or cranberries or a small moshed banana or table spoon of apple sauce or similar,
Unsweetened yogurt with some fruit or less sugary granola.
Cereal which isn't sweet, less that 15% sugar content.
A descent sized tuna sandwich. Fish with rice. Meat with potatoes. And a salad with those meals..Doesn't need to be anything fancy. Cut a pepper or a tomato.
Or vegetarian or vegan alternatives. Those are only couple of examples .The key thing is not to eat meals containing plenty of sugar and fat. If you don't prepare it your self you don't know how fat and sweet it is.
It could like lunch. Our family usually eats a warm meal a day. Other's two. Personally, I think that creates a lot of extra work for the person in charge of the cooking.
Soup, with bread and salad. Unsweetened yogurt with fruit or/and some homemade granola (very easy to make) or nuts. and salad with a piece of bread. A salad with cottage cheese. Vegetarian or vegan alternative.
Personally, I usually ave one snack between lunch and supper. This if I work from home. If working outside the home I usually have a snack between breakfast and lunch as well. I could be a handful of nuts or/and couple of table spoons of cottage cheese. An apple and cracker with natural unsweetened peanut butter.
The key is to sync your eating with your physical activity. As you are very well aware of you feel hungrier if you work in the garden for three hours comparing with sitting behind the computer. Learn to differ between being hungry and having a cravings. A good rule is not to eat about three hours before you go to bed.
One school of thought recommend intermittent fast, meaning that you eat two meals and then you fast for 14-16 hours. According to the supporters this should give you health benefits. I can't tell you to do this or stay way from it. I don't know enough about it. If you like read more about it go to mercola.com and search for intermittent fasting.
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